A Very Groovy Adventure part 2
The Bear Woods
After the inevitable crash, the players either make their way to or find themselves in the middle of a large burnt clearing with about 10 crashed paddle wheelers, all marked as mark 1 through 10. There is a road leading to a small village nearby and a sign that says “To Destination Town”. This small hamlet was set up when it became apparent that there was a steady influx of people to this side of the forest, so it was sensible to set up a town here. Once through the town, there is a dirt road leading through the forest to the citadel.
The Mayor.
The Mayor welcomes the players to Gnome World and offers a small reward for saving the bears, if that is what they ended up doing. He tells them that Gnome world exists outside the normal experience of the outside world. Gnome Citadel is the place to go to find out how to get back home.
Rolf Harris
This is a random encounter whilst traveling through the woods. During the night, the players begin to hear a rhythmic sound, like great wings slowly beating the air. The sound fades in and out, but seems to be getting steadily nearer. There seems to be singing as well. At this point a roll against fear at +5 should be made. Eventually words can be made out “…2 little boys had 2 little toys.” at which point a roll against petrification should be made. A fail means the player is frozen to the spot for D6 rounds. Rolf enters the clearing.
Rolf’s Wobble Board is a distance weapon that does D8 of boredom damage.
Rolf is wearing the Blundstone Boots of Grip.
When Rolf is vanquished, his body turns to fine ash and as his spirit begins to disperse the players hear “I will be back – I always come back…”
Gnome Citadel
An imposing citadel built into the side of a mountain. Against the base of the cliff is a row of about 20 rubber cords stretching up to a hole in a floor of the citadel. Gnomes strap themselves to a harness and release the cord, which bungies them into the citadel. The cords are sent down by platforms which hold about 8 gnomes and re-tied at the base. The citadel is the center of government and is inhabited by Tinker and Sphincter gnomes.
Sphinctal Gnomes
These anal retentive little characters become the leaders and accountants of gnomish society. If they live that long.
Tinker Gnomes
Cute little inventor gnomes; imagine Ewoks with brains. Their inventions are rarely good for much, having a tendency to not work or work in a much more exiting manner than they were intended.
The citadel is full of gnomes and industrious noises. There is quite a large city that seems to be carved into the mountain. From the high vantage of the wall, they can see down into the city. Houses and buildings fill up the space inside the walls and caverns can be seen to stretch out into the mountain. Smoke drifts up from many of the chimneys and there is a smell of roasting meat and burning firewood.
As they arrive, they are greeted by a small party of sphincter gnomes who take them through the city to an enormous palace carved out of a wall. In the middle of an enormous man made cavern stands an enormous garden gnome. The king of the gnomes sits on a throne at the base of this idol. He decrees that they must defeat the king’s champion to prove themselves worthy of information about their predicament.
If the Garden Gnome Idol is destroyed, the entire place will slide down the hill. Lets hope they read the sign that says “Warning, Idol contains anchor chain, please do not destroy.
Before they go off to their challenge, they are taken to the Tinker Gnomes for new armor, weapons or equipment. They will have lost something in the wheeler crash.
They see a number of projects being tested. These are explained by the kings aid. In keeping with the James Bond mood, the head tinker’s name is W.
“This is our Experimental cooking section – these fellows are accelerating baked chicken to near light speeds to see if the taste slows down at relativistic speeds. And here we study the high frequency radiation that streams off a good vindaloo when it collides with a papadum moving at near light speeds in the opposite direction.”
“Oh, here are our Doom Chickens. We are working on a multi purpose chook about the house.” a mechanical chook come up, offers a scientist a coffee, then stabs him in the leg. He is carried away.
“Oh, dear. Needs more work, I’m afraid. To tell you the truth, we are trying to get rid of some of the older models. If you ever want to buy one, send money to this address and we’ll post one right out to you.” He gives them all a card.
Doom Chickens
Chucky chicken – 5 sharp blades down each wing. 5 chucky chickens can combine to form the powerful FowlTron
Percolator chicken – Café?
Letter opener chicken – Opens all sorts of paper products. These are also the only key back to their own world, being able to open the top of the cornflake packet for them.
Gardening Chicken
General purpose cleaning chicken (steel wool chook)
The players may find a post box any time they need one (somehow) and upon posting an order a gnome will arrive (in a stylish way) with their chicken.
Under no circumstance will they be able to get their money back as the chickens are not covered by any sort of warranty and the Gnome kingdom has no consumer affairs laws.
After the tinker gnomes sort them out for stuff (if they want something, sell it to them. Have some fun, make stuff up for them), they are taken under guard to the arena.
Arena of Challenge
Inside the citadel is a stone coliseum with a sandy arena in the center. Three large stone arches with metal grills give selective access to the floor. The fighting ground is ringed with black and yellow striped poles.
The Peruvian Yellow Stripped Guppy is the Champion. He blends perfectly against any of the 20 or so poles around the outside. The guppy is fast. Very fast. He moves from pole to pole, stopping only to shout out threats and taunts. He also knows martial arts, slapping with both flippers, tail slap and the feared guppy mouth gum.
One of the party must face the guppy. They will not even see the guppy until they are in the center of the arena. Naturally they will win – it is after all just a guppy.
The players are then instructed to go to Shanty town, where the dread pirate Gus has a magical item that can take them home. They must kill the pirate.
