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Pirojkis

Serve by themselves or as an accompaniment to Borscht.

Pastry;
2 3/4 cups flour
150g butter
2 eggs plus 1 egg yolk – beaten
pinch salt

Make a well in the center of the flour and put all ingredients in. Mix together to form a firm dough. Roll out several times, folding each time.

Filling;
3 eggs
200g cream cheese
100g butter
powdered nutmeg
salt and pepper
parsley

Boil 2 eggs, shell and mince. Blend all ingredients together.

Roll dough and cut into circles – about 8cm diameter. Place a small spoon of filling in each, fold in half and seal. Brush with egg and bake at 200c for about 20 minutes.

Damien’s Random and Vaguely Planed Birthday Party!

Once again the cold has set in and that means it is time to light a fire and try to avoid the subject of my getting older as we drink ourselves silly by the light of a full moon.

The Party will be on the 16th of August and starts between 6 and 7, food will be entrees only (bring a plate if you feel inspired). I will be making some fresh Chicken Liver Pate and some other random food and there will also be Illusions on tap.

We were going to make it a cocktail night but it is a nightmare to organise people to bring the right mixers – and it always ends up with people drinking awful green or blue coloured concoctions at 3 in the morning. So BYO whatever you feel like drinking (if it isn’t Illusion Very Happy).

Croquette may be on the cards depending on weather conditions, general mood, if I can be assed setting up the Hoop of Fire and if I can bribe Sebastian into telling me where he stashed all the brightly coloured balls.

Since Cathy wants to come dressed as a Lobster Bisque (entree sized I assume) it will have to be a costume party too – the good news is that due to the shortish notice we are offering a platter of themes to make things easier;

1) Dress as your favourite cocktail or entree,
2) Come dressed as the lovechild of your favourite two communist dictators,
3) Russian Penguin party – byo ice cubes (can be merged with theme two if you are feeling particularly esoteric),
4) Kermit the Frog party,
5) Evil Villain party,
5) Schoolgirl and Garry Glitter party,

or

6) Come dressed in formal gear if you run out of time Smile

The costumes are also there to give me something to light with my newly built Second Generation Dodgy Theater Lights™.

So, decide what sort of party you are attending and come equipped accordingly.

Anyone unable to attend the party needs to email me in advance so I can photo-shop them into the photos. A small fee or pony may apply.

Bassie and the Fishes

Sebastian is going through a fish phase right now. Anything aquatic gets carried about in his pockets, taken to bed and generally collected and sorted.

For many weeks he has been eying off a pool toy shark at Kmart and the other day I decided to get it for him (he had been very good that morning).

He was a bit disappointed when I first opened the box as it just contained a flat grey bit of plastic. Then re realised it was shark shaped. And then he saw that it could be inflated and got extremely excited.

He has been dragging it about for days now and gets me to tuck it into bed with him sometimes – Quinn thinks it is the scariest thing ever so I have to take special care to keep them separate – luckily Bastian is more than happy to keep the shark to himself and feed it in another room :P

The last two photos are of Sebastian in his fish costume at school.

Bickies on Cheese

When cheese on biscuits gets a bit old, sometimes it is a good thing to mix it up a bit. Thank you Tallulah for bringing the world Bickies on Cheese :D

Building Damien a Gazebo

Wood,
Nails,
Paint,
Canvas,
Pillows,
Hammock.

Since Damien is such a groovy guy and seems to have a strange fascination with gazebo’s, it may occur to you at some point that it would be a grand idea to build one for him.

Don’t resist this urge. He is a Leo and makes an effort to react well to presents.

Gazebo’s should be brightly coloured and comfortable and I am sure he would let you smoke bongs in it occasionally. You can also think of the envious neighbours who would gaze upon our gazebo and sigh, thinking of the discontent they feel in their own lives, which could so easily be filled by a brightly coloured recreational garden ornament such as ours.

Assemble all ingredients in a logical and eye-pleasing manner. Wrap and serve.

Building a Dalek

These are plans I found on the web years ago – they are very detailed and will result in your very own Dalek. I have always wanted one so I can turn it into a multi purpose kitchen appliance (blender, mp3 player, plunger/eggbeater/spatula holder, ect…)

I have taken the necessary steps (not included in plans) to have some babies and am presently training them up to assist me with this project.

how-to-build-a-dalek

Toasted Fish Finger Sandwiches

The secret here is variety. Some of my all time favourites are; peanut butter and cheese, salad and mayonnaise, cranberry and avocado or seeded mustard, bacon and asparagus.

Don’t be afraid to experiment.

I tried a deep fried, battered fish finger sandwich the other day and, whilst it tasted like roadkill, I did not lose heart. I would love a job in experimental cooking one of these days – I have some theories about the taste of chicken slowing down as it approaches the speed of light, which I would like to test out. Funding for the 10km article accelerator is in the works, so it is just a matter of time before I can study the high frequency radiation that streams off a good Vindaloo when it collides with a high speed Pappadum moving in the opposite direction.

Last Food in the Fridge Stew

This is an old recipe I scribbled down when I was living in a share house…

1 Shriveled Carrot
1/2 an onion
1 clove of garlic
The equivalent of 3 cloves of garlic in dried and mushed form
The dregs of 3 different types of pasta
1 tin of tomato
3 tomato ends
Soy sauce
A bunch of sausages from the freezer, courtesy the Dept. of Power and Water random outage
Dried basil, oregano and chille
Salt and pepper to taste
1 measure of Intestinal Fortitude
1 1/2 portions of Sense of Humor

After glaring at your flatmate for forgetting to buy any vegetables, straighten the carrot out as best as possible and peel away the black bits. Soak in cold water for a few minutes to give the carrot some backbone, then slice it and the onion, being sure to avoid any parts that are too mushy.

Fry them in oil until brown. Add the sausages and a splash of soy. When the sausages are well browned, slice them into bite sized bits and add everything else to a large pot.

Simmer like you’ve never simmered before, until everything has joined in union with everything else.

Serve with alcohol and SBS TV.

Damien’s Special Napoli Pasta Thingy

Fry 1 large onion and 3 cloves garlic in a portion of The Often Forgotten Garlic and Dill Compact Butter.

Add 800g tinned tomatoes and 1 bunch of basil (you can use The Basil That Time Forgot in the very back of your fridge, providing it has not evolved).

Kitchen rule – if it talks back, call somebody.

Add 1 cup of water, dried herbs and whatever vegetables you can scrounge. Stew for at least an hour. Season and serve with pasta.

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